The Pathetic Trainer

It’s been almost six months since I started this new job at the maternity hospital. So much to tell, with so little time available. It is this fact, the lack of time available for reading/writing/having fun, that is haunting me. I’m afraid I’m turning into a character I’ve been despising for years, that is, an individual running on money, just like how a car runs on gas.

It’s surprisingly thought provoking when I recall the time I used to work in Biomedical Engineering, going hand in hand with this trainer whose morals were curiously questioned, and the overflowing enthusiasm I had back then. Back then, I always wanted to do the best I can, learn the best I can, and help as many people as I can. And here comes the funny part: I did not take a single penny. I somehow had the power and will to work overtime, help this and help that, all for the sake of, what exactly? I don’t know. Professionalism maybe? Conscience? Good will?

But that doesn’t matter. What matters is the powerful dedication that I had during these months as a Biomedical Engineer, that came to fade the moment I started working in return for a salary. Something happened, deep down inside, the moment I received my first salary in my hands from our financial manager. What happened exactly? I have no idea, but I have some clues to work on.

My dedication for work began to change its skin, little by little, gradually turning into a dedication for money. I’ve become motivated to do this and do that only if a material return is promised. The thought of helping someone with a job is slowly being haunted by the thought:

If you're good at something, never do it for free!

My interest in doing the things that I love is deliberately coming to a halt. I rarely play my guitar nowadays, I never open my reader to read what my fellow bloggers have to say. Even Facebook, the one tool that I use to interact with my old school friends, is being affected and slowly becoming an occasional thing.

All of a sudden, I find myself in this trainer’s shoes. I remember the times he used to rest, counting remaining hours/minutes/seconds to go home with a day’s money he did not work for. All I thought of back then was; What is wrong with this guy? Why is he acting so pathetically, carelessly not worrying about his duties, and just waiting for the end of the month to receive his salary? And before I know it, I became the pathetic trainer.

When did money become my number one interest? Does the lifestyle of paying your own bills and expenses have to do with any of this? Or is it the monetary system as a whole that is responsible for exposing people to such behavior? What about you? Have you ever been in a situation where you’ve noticed how voluntary work can be more sincere?

 

Just a Random Update

It has been like an everlasting struggle to keep one’s head above the water, with notorious creatures lurking around you, anticipating the moment you fail to survive. One would excuse those creatures, if they were to gain benefit from your failure. But no. It seems that some creatures anticipate your submission without an apparent reason. Sometimes it’s the absence of a motive that throws in the confusion, making it hard to perceive, or even believe a certain action.

The past few months have been quite tough on us, my mom and I, since she has lost her job as a university Professor, and all of a sudden we were forced to reconsider our options. Since my presence here in Saudi Arabia was dependent on hers, both of us were faced with the option of returning back to our home country Egypt, where the unrest seems never-ending. Another option, was for me to start a job, and become an independent immigrant. And luckily for me, I thankfully found a job that would cover my rent and expenses for a while, until something better shows up for me, and hopefully life starts to blossom, hopefully.

The way I see it, my mom lost her job because of three reasons. The first, was a reckless action she took a while ago, asking for a sick leave from her Egyptian university, while traveling back over here to resume her work as an immigrant. The second, was a fellow colleague of hers over here, knowing about what she had done over there, making a call to the Egyptian university to inform them about this breach. Finally, it turns out that this same fellow colleague of hers, has been back stabbing her for a while, eventually leading to the termination of her contract here.

Regardless to my mom’s mistake, it’s kind of saddening to see someone from your own home country wishing you the worst. That’s exactly how most Egyptians deal with each other abroad, and I have no idea why. I mean, when I look at other nationalities like Indians for example or Filipinos, they’re helping each other rise in their work and social life. Unlike Arabs, or Egyptians to be precise; there’s always some envy going on, there’s always some kind of hidden hatred that floats to the surface whenever it gets the chance. We really need help.

Anyhow, I’ve been working for like two months now, and thankfully everything has been going smoothly. I’m in a Maternity and Children’s Hospital, responsible for doing the statistics, as well as taking care of the IT department. So far the working environment couldn’t be better, thank God. People are really friendly and helpful. There’s just this small issue that has been bothering me slightly. I’m sitting in an office with three Filipino females, and they keep talking to each other in a language I don’t speak, probably in Tagalog, or so I’ve reached in my Google search about the language they speak. And this issue spreads to the whole Hospital, where 90% of the workers are Filipinos. The moment you step inside the Hospital, you are stepping into a Filipino Territory. Everyone speaks in Tagalog, they only speak English with clients or when they need something from you.

For that reason, I’ve decided to start learning Tagalog! Just in case someone decided to make fun of you in a language you don’t speak, you could confidently understand what they’re talking about. There’s this awesome software that easily teaches you any foreign language you wish to learn, and pretty much effectively as if you’re learning it at school. It’s called Rosetta Stone, check it out if you’re interested.

That’s it for now, I hope you’re all doing great. I will try to keep you updated with what’s going on with me as much as I can.

Thank you for reading

 

My Ex, Illness, and Aunt

I’m totally lost and confused nowadays. I was talking to my Ex yesterday, and I sort of every time I talk to her, end up not feeling well. I end up lost between feelings of grief and joy. Like should I be happy that I’m talking to her again, or should I feel bad that we’re no longer like before.

I hate those moments of illness, where you don’t know what’s right and what’s wrong, or what’s good and what’s bad for you. I don’t know if you guys know this, but I’m really thankful to have you in my life, to know every single one of you. Some of you enlighten me, others give me hope and encouragement. But more importantly, I see all of you as a blessing. It’s so rarely when you find a hate free zone where you can express your feelings freely, with no worries whatsoever.

My Aunt has done the operation successfully, thank God. She is currently recovering and we’re anticipating the rise of her platelets count hopefully. The amount of love and support that I’ve received over my last post about my Aunt is also overwhelming. I feel like I wanna share it with everyone I know. One person sent me an email shining with positive energy, informing me that a special visit to church was made for the sake of my Aunt’s recovery. No words can describe how I felt at that moment. This is how the world should react with each other. I really wish the world was a bigger version of the WordPress community. In other words, I really wish we had a meeting every once in a while, share the love, and enjoy the genuine beauty of human kind.

Thank you, I definitely feel better now <3

Musing, my Aunt

I cannot declare in confidence that my life is gonna stay as steady as it is right now. I know for sure that there will be hard times. In other words, there is suffering scheduled to appear in my way, and I have to be ready for it. I don’t wanna fall in the exact same pits that I’ve fallen into before. I wish for a new life, a new beginning, where one can authentically sense his surroundings, speak with confidence, and sleep with no regret. I’ve been there before, I’m there now, so I know how good it is and how ugly it is on the other side.

I’m sorry I haven’t been following up with you guys lately. My aunt is having a Splenectomy today, she’s been suffering from a low platelets count for a while, tried several methods but non of them worked, and now the doctors have no choice but to go for the operation. It’s a small operation actually, we just hope it succeeds in raising the platelets count, hopefully. Could you please keep her in your thoughts and prayers? Thank you <3

May Allah be with us all..

Peace

Venusians

Its amazing how one’s mood can change so dramatically from one minute to the next. One minute you’re happily flying above the clouds, receiving everything with optimism and joy. The next minute your soul turns so ill, feels like you need a punching bag so badly just to keep hitting it as hard as you can to release some trapped energy.

What’s even more amazing is the reason that triggers your anger. It is believed that a woman by the name Helen of Troy is what triggered the anger and started the Trojan war that lasted 10 years!

Women by instinct have some sort of hidden power that is when unleashed can cause irreversible damage. Especially if that woman is your ex, damage possibility doubles in an instance. I’ve seen so many posts that warn about talking with your ex, but I refuse to believe I am one of those people. I like to believe I am special.

That’s when reality manifests itself hitting me in the face, referring me to grow up, or else I still need more suffering to understand that I’m not that special.

But my mood has calmed down eventually, although the inflicted wounds are too deep and often leave a scar. Gotta be careful though next time. I don’t know what it is exactly about women that makes us melt in front of them! Seriously its so unethical. You women need to understand your power. With great power comes great responsibility, and you have a hell of a power over men. Just try to use it wisely without tampering with our emotions, that’s all I’m asking.

May none of us (men) ever stand in the way of a woman’s wrath.. Amen

May Allah be with us all

Peace

Interview at Orange

Sometimes we pass by intense circumstances, where we find ourselves reluctant, unable to think properly or take the right decision. The day before yesterday was a day I will remember for the rest of my life.

It all started with my cousin forwarding my CV to his so called “friend” who works at Orange Business Services. After an hour or so I received a phone call from a person claiming to be an engineer working at Orange, asking me if I was a Cisco Certified Network Associate or not, and of course my answer was “Yes Al7amdulellah”. So he proceeded in the interview and asked if I can come for a technical test the next day at 3:00 pm sharp wearing formal. I responded with a “Yes, of course!” and ended the call with a jump for joy.

I had to organize that day pretty well, because I had a very busy schedule on that day. A french course from 9:00 am till 11:00 am, and a CCNP course from 11:30 am till 2:00 pm, so I had to head to City Stars directly after a long day of courses.

While I hate wearing suits, I had to wear a suit all day long because the engineer made it clear that I have to be formal and arrive at 3:00 pm sharp!

So I did wear a suit and went to my french course, followed by my CCNP course. My CCNP instructor knew that I had an interview after his course right away, so he volunteered to get me ready for the interview by revising some CCNA material, a kind and generous act as I always expected from him.

Afterwards I rode with my driver heading to Nasr City in the busy traffic, which took us nearly an hour to be there, arriving at Orange City Stars Capital 5 at 2:50 pm.

I remember I arrived at 2:55 pm, met the engineer who interviewed me on the phone and met my cousin’s friend who gave me a warm welcome. Both of them were wearing T-Shirts and Jeans as well as every single person working, which made me think: Why did he let me wear a suit? Anyway, both of them sat with me in a small room, and the show began. I thought the engineer will interview me alone, but then I noticed that both of them had papers that need to be filled, so I thought “How awesome is that?!”.

At the beginning they introduced themselves to me, emphasizing that if I pass the interview I would be nothing but a useless client, which was not good to start with, but I did not show any frustration at that moment because I was an interviewee and that was my job back then.

After asking me to introduce myself in English, they started asking me technical questions, out of which was none unanswered. Then they started asking me questions that are out of the CCNA course material, out of the working requirements that are needed to be present in the person applying for the job, while showing condemnation in their faces. First I thought I had some sort of dereliction in my studies, my sweat glands began to perspire and I started to feel bad. Then I realized that even my cousin’s friend who gave me a warm welcome at the beginning, seemed like my cousin’s enemy from the way he was questioning me, not his friend at all. When we reached the HR part of the interview, every answer of mine was followed by a mocking comment and expression from both of them.

For a moment there, I thought to myself: What’s really going on here? This is not how I was treated before in other interviews! There’s gotta be a catch somewhere..

After interviewing me for about 30 minutes, they sat me down on a computer for a technical test for 90 minutes, followed by an IQ test for 30 minutes. During the IQ test, I already had signs of fatigue and it was unethical to do so, but who cares?!

At the end, the engineer took me aside to tell me my results, and guess what? I passed!

But as I thought, there was a catch, and a sick catch. He said and I quote: “You have passed all the tests we gave you, but unfortunately we have a problem in hiring people at the moment, so you have to wait and I cannot promise you anything.”

In conclusion, they were occupying my time and tampering with my nerves for hours for a reason that is yet to be known. Of course I was frustrated at that moment. Thinking to myself, if they had a problem with hiring people, why did he call me? Why did they interview me? Is this some kind of a sick game?

Then I looked at the bright side, although I was humiliated and mocked by priceless people who need Colonoscopy, I gained a great amount of experience in dealing with such people. Of course I had a few resentments, but at the end of the day I was cheerfully tweeting, listening to music and enjoying my time.

There’s a latin phrase that says: Carpe Diem, which means seize the moment, enjoy every second of it and make it useful. No matter how tough the world can be sometimes, we still need to enjoy it in order to live happily.

May Allah be with us all..

Peace!

Welcome!

Okay!

This is my first post in my first blog, don’t know even what the word blog means, but anyhow here I am typing what I have in mind. You may find me jumping from one subject to another because they’re just random thoughts as I type, so try not to get bored in between :)

I believe we can change anything, from the inner core of ourselves to the vast scale around us. I remember two years ago, my interests were limited to music, movies, chilling out.. Now my interests are limited to tweeting, music, movies and chilling out. Sometimes I get caught in politics but I actually don’t hate anything more than this stupid subject.. Politics! I never paid attention to politics before the revolution, and when I tried to get to know it a little bit, I realized I was arguing about human rights and not politics.

So moving on to music, I have been enjoying music since the day I was aware of this world around me. Its like a language that only musicians speak and understand through each other. Since I’m a Muslim, it was important for me to know whether music is Halal (Allowed/Permitted) or Haram (Forbidden) in our religion. So I listened to an Islamic preacher who is well known in our community and with a great reputation, and he was saying and I quote “The Imams have argued about the Prophet Mohammad’s PBUH Hadith that mentioned the people who are using musical instruments, some of them see the Hadith as the Prophet is Forbidding music and others see it as the Prophet is not necessarily forbidding music, so as long as the Imams have argued on a subject, you have the freedom of choice between the opinions, and you can choose whatever choice that suits you.” So guess which choice have I chosen!

Moving on to the twitter community. First of all twitter have introduced me to people of all the ages from young to old and most importantly they are like my family now. We tend to babel to each  other our problems, make fun of our leaders, sharing things from funny meaningless stuff to important serious stuff that people should be aware of. Before  signing up for a new twitter account I had a facebook account, and the information I had about twitter was that its all about knowing the news before anyone else knows it. I was wrong, because then I realized that its more like a lifestyle. I tend to tweet in between every single activity in the day! From waking up in the morning till the moment before I fall asleep. I consider myself new to twitter and this is my view of it so far, who knows maybe it could be different in the future.

I guess that’s enough for today! I’m still a beginner of course, remember that please and kindly be polite in criticizing, not just here but everywhere.. That would be nice of you :)