My Two Extremes

Do we realize that its not about what we do to please people? That its all about feeling satisfied about what we’re doing?

I’ve been striving to find an explanation for my life, an explanation for what I’ve been doing for the past 10 years. If I would list the things that I’ve done till now, they would appear contradicting or maybe symptoms of multiple personality disorder.

Some of us may be familiar with the strange case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde. As a matter of fact, my life is pretty much similar to this novel. I’ve been trying to fit myself into two different personalities. The first is the religious Mohamed who memorizes parts of the Holy Quran and uses all what he knows for the benefit of human kind. The second is the rebellious Mohamed who knows by heart every single way towards the destruction of human kind.

Its very tough to live this lifestyle, because you feel like your mind is being driven by two different people. There’s an Arabic proverb that says: “The ship that has two captains must drown”. Similarly, the mind that has two personalities cannot withstand the huge pressure of being part of two different personalities. It’s like someone is pulling it towards east, and another is pulling it towards west, eventually it will split apart.

It is important to acknowledge that no matter how hard I try to stay being the religious Mohamed, the other Mohamed fights back for his freedom. While the rebellious Mohamed is in control, the religious fights back for his, and the sequence goes on and on..

But I have a huge faith that one of the two personalities will defeat the other. Which one exactly, I’m not sure. I just hope and pray for the first one to win..

May Allah be with us all..



Signs of illness

I feel vulnerable, confused, insecure and full of hate. Why? Well its a long story that started with hope and ended with misery. We all have to grow up someday and realize that no one is as he/she seems. Who seems like a Preacher acts like an Atheist. Who seems like the closest person to me acts like my enemy. I may be suffering from psychological issues. But the truth is, we are all mentally ill; we tend to do everything wrong to the people around us, but when they do to us the same we become rebellion and refuse to handle things. We have zero tolerance towards one another. Sometimes its the arrogance that takes over us, preventing us from even listening to each other. Each person sees what he chooses to see, listens to what makes him feel better and speaks, in his perspective, only wisdom.

Today’s Reality

The situation is getting critical everyday, no one really knows what’s going on. Some people have theories, others claim to know facts. There’s only one thing that’s certain; We are living in a daily nightmare.

Its been almost two years now since the Egyptian Revolution took place on the 25th of January 2011. But of course, everything has changed now. We are living in a democratic nation now, aren’t we? If I was a family member of one of the martyrs, I would be very glad and grateful to the SCAF “Supreme Council of Abusion and Fraud” and the MB “Muslim Bafflers”.

They both played an important role in achieving the goals of the revolution; Non-existence, Slavery and Social Inequality. Some goals are not yet achieved, those include Civil War, External Occupation and an Extermination of our species.

Thank you all for supporting our dreams and believing in them, we value them greatly. We hope to see you all in Heaven.

May Allah be with us all..


A Plea of Desperation

Here we are, once again.. Back to square number one. After a long way towards freedom, full of obstacles, we finally learn one thing.. If you always do what you’ve always done, you’ll always get what you’ve always got..

Its no longer a choice, we are bound to get our ass kicked. No matter what we do or what we say, some people don’t listen.. Or maybe some people got used to their current lifestyle, and are not willing to pay for a change..

We all live in the same bubble, but not all of us pay the price. Its the weak, unhealthy, poor and anonymous people who get to work their ass off the hook of every system. And its the powerful, healthy, rich and well known people who take credit for it.

If you are one of the latter, you will never show sympathy to anyone from the former. If you are one of the former, you will always show envy towards the latter. Its really a sick world we’re living, and guess who takes the credit then? Atheists!

To have a dream and live for it is good, but you have to have something aside, tolerance. If you are not tolerant towards the daily events of your life, you might just give up your dream right before it happens..

Watch the current events with care. See how the presidential candidates refused to unite with each other, and how that affected the votes. See how each candidate’s supporters fight each other on whose right and whose wrong. Most of all, take a close look at Shafiq’s supporters and how they feel about themselves. Do not underestimate the power of ignorance.

Those who piss us the most, are our greatest teachers. We may start questioning ourselves or even fall in the “Why” misconception. I just hope we get out of where we are soon, a plea of desperation..

May Allah be with us all..