There are some factors that may alter our perception without ourselves willing to do so. One of those factors is the people we sit and talk with on a daily basis, friends. If we do not pay attention to the value that each friend has and adds to us, we may end up victims of unintentional influence.
It is very healthy for us to have friends with whom we constantly share our interests, feelings, and activities we encounter. As a matter of fact, what’s the point of buying a new pair of shoes if you do not have someone to tell you “Congratulations to the floor!” Life has no meaning either if you do not have someone to tell you “Damn! I envy you! you piece of shit!” kinda things when you fall in love, move to a better place or to a better position, and so on.
As much important as it is to have friends, it is even more crucial to have friends who inspire us to become who we wish to be. Because, believe it or not, once a person becomes your “friend”, it’s only a matter of time before you become the beta version of that friend. You are a copycat of your BFFs in everything either good or bad, their vocabulary, self-esteem, confidence, attitude, you name it!
While I was in college, I changed the gangs I used to hang out with several times. That gave me the perfect example of how friends can have a significant effect on oneself immediately; Hanging out with a group of people whose vocabulary was clean of curses clearly affected my choice of words generally with anyone, and vice versa. Hanging out with a group of people whose attitude was always positive clearly affected my performance, grades, and so on.
Friendships should point out your flaws, enrich your experiences, bring you joy, and encourage you to be who you want to be. So if you, by anyway, find out that’s not the case, you may be a victim of a negative influence of friendship.
Two friends were traveling together, when a Bear suddenly met them on their path. One of them climbed up quickly into a tree and concealed himself in the branches. The other, seeing that he must be attacked, fell flat on the ground, and when the Bear came up and felt him with his snout, and smelt him all over, he held his breath, and feigned the appearance of death as much as he could. The Bear soon left him, for it is said he will not touch a dead body. When the Bear was quite gone, the other friend descended from the tree, and jokingly inquired of his friend what it was the Bear had whispered in his ear. “He gave me this advice,” his companion replied. “Never travel with a friend who deserts you at the approach of danger.”
Sometimes we are bound to leave behind those who are not willing to climb the mountain with us. Those who sometimes discourage us in order to stay where they are, and do not leave their comfort zones.
Practice makes perfect! The more friendships you’ll have the more you’ll easily distinct genuine from fake, good from bad, and so on. So on your travel towards a greater you, only take counsels from those who have already been there. Instead of wasting your time with people giving you ill-fitted advices, spend your time with the people who have been there, done that, and came out of it successfully.
May Allah be with us all, and guides us towards the right choices in life always..